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Relationships Department


Dr. Edward A. Dreyfus

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This column is not any form of psychotherapy or a replacement for professional, individualized services. Opinions expressed here do not necessarily represent the position of SelfhelpMagazine.com.

This is an index of past questions and Answers only.

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Previous Questions



20 year old woman in love with 33 year old married man
Disappointed over husband's affair.
I am a 50 year old married man and I am involved with a 30 year old married lady.
I'm married and involved with a married woman - can it work?
I've been involved with a married man for over three years.
Last year my wife had an affair, I'm afraid its still going on.
My wife and I both had affairs and now I'm considering staying with her...
My wife and I are having troubles and I'm tempted by a co-worker
Wants to marry man who will divorce soon

Adult Children

55 year old step-son interfering in 39 year marriage
Adult child feeling disloyal to parents.
Is there any hope of having a relationship with my verbally abusive 15-year old daughter?
Problems that adult children of divorce have in relationships.

Best Friend

Confused over the nature of a friendship.
I'm contemplating turning a friendship into a romance
My best friend refuses to treat me right
My relationship with my abused friend is very difficult.
One of my best friends told me he liked me.
She never warned me that she just wanted to be friends.
Will a sexual relationship with a friend interfere with the friendship?


Boyfriend is extremely jealous and possessive
Boyfriend never satisfied.
Boyfriend turned abusive after talks about marriage
Boyfriend wants to delay marriage for 6 months.
I live with my boyfriend and he writes his old girlfriends birthdays and their ages down on his calendar. NEW!
I recently broke up with my boyfriend of three years.
I'm comfortable with my boyfriend, but we don't have any sexual chemistry.
I've cheated twice on my boyfriend of four years.
My boyfriend is too honest...
My boyfriend of two months wants to get married.
My boyfriend of 8 months has lost trust in me.
My boyfriend's daughter just came to live with us...
Telling new boyfriend about past rape and incest


42 year old divorcee & dating.
After 4 years of having a long distance relationship
How can you tell if someone is right for you?
I become overly possessive in a relationship...
I dated a guy a few times and it didn't work out.
I feel I am not worthy of a relationship
I have always been shy, especially when it comes to talking with girls.
I'm 25 years old, and engaged to a 32 year woman with a 15 year old son.
I'm about to be married for the second time.
I'm an 18 year old female considering marriage to a 39 year old man.
I'm dating a guy that was dating my roommate, how do I tell her?
I'm not pressured to have sex but I feel scared and wrong every time.
I've rekindled an old relationship, but she has a new flame...
I've tried so hard to make relationships work.
Recommended time for grieving old relationships before beginning new ones
They are gentlemen at first, then they turn into creeps.
We've been together for 3 years, but he is not ready for a commitment
When I meet a man, I become obsessed.
When to break off relationship.

Divorce & Separations

Divorced Parents need to establish guidelines
Is it appropriate to have any contact with one's ex after a divorce?
Is there a recommended time for grieving old relationships before starting new ones? NEW!
My husband and I have been divorced for fifteen months, we are considering reconciliation but..
My wife and I have had a tumultuous five-year marriage.
My wife says that she needs space and time to make sure she loves me.
Physically or emotionally abusive...refusing to get help
Separated for over a year, but wanting to save marriage.
Six year relationship that ended suddenly.
Will a second marriage to the same person work?
Would it be unreasonable to leave a stable and secure relationship to "find myself?"


Girlfriend is jealous, physically and verbally abusive.
Girlfriend wants more space since divorce is final
I find myself obsessed with trying to find a girlfriend.
I found a lot of erotic pictures of my husband's old girlfriends.
I'm worried about my brother, as his girlfriend behaves erratically.
My 21 year old brother was dumped by his girlfriend.
My girlfriend complains that I don't listen to her when she is trying to talk to me about something serious. NEW!
My girlfriends daughter won't accept us


How can I get my wife to stop spending so much time on-line?
How can I make my husband stand up for himself?
Husband fantasizes about wife with another woman.
Is my husband's interest in internet pornography healthy?
Money and marriage, how does it work today?
My husband does not respect my right to have my own friends...
My husband has a habit of looking at other women.
My husband places more emphasis on drinking and being with friends
My husband's idea of marriage is based on a master-slave model
My marriage is falling apart, because I have withdrawn.
My spouse doesn't respect me.
My wife has difficulty controlling her anger
Rarely having sex.
What's best for my children - to stay married or move into lesbian household? NEW!
Wife avoids responsibility.


I'm living in an unhealthy relationship with my mom.
I severed my ties to my abusive family some time ago.
My 92 year old mother is realizing that she is forgetting things.

Trust & Self Esteem

How can I re-establish a sense of trust with my sister?
How can I trust again within a relationship?
How do we heal from fear of rejection?
How do you deal with a spouse who habitually lies?
I am a 37-year-old woman who has difficulties with self-esteem.
I find myself distrusting relationships, how can I find the right one?
I have gone through a string of relationships that follow a pattern. NEW!
I have trouble believing that he can truly love me despite my being overweight.
I'm engaged to a guy who cannot trust me...
I've always had a problem with jealousy in my relationships
My fiance has difficulty giving me compliments.
My husband always accuses me of things I don't do
The men I choose seem to be sincere in words, but not in actions.


Attraction to teacher.
Fear of public speaking.


Dr. Patricia Pitta is a clinical psychologist practicing in Manhasset, New York, for more than 20 years. She is a Diplomat in Family Psychology of the American Psychological Association and an Approved Supervisor of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy. Dr. Pitta is also the President of the Long Island Association of Marriage and Family Therapy.

She has created a treatment modality that enables the partners to accept responsibility for their parts in relationship problems leading to resolution of issues without getting stuck in blame. She encourages self growth which enhances couple growth and family development.


Dr. Edward A. Dreyfus is a Clinical Psychologist, Marriage, Family, Child Therapist, and Sex Therapist. Dr. Dreyfus has been providing psychological services in the Los Angeles-Santa Monica area for over 30 years. He offers individual psychotherapy to adolescents and adults, divorce mediation, couples counseling, group therapy, and career and vocational counseling and assessment.His book, Someone Right For You, is available in the Amazing Bookstore Catalog.

Dr. Dreyfus can be reached at: (310) 208-5700.


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