My boyfriend and I have been together for three and half years.
We have a good relationship, but he is not ready to make a commitment. My
question is if he is not ready after three years, do you think he will ever
be ready? And if so, will that lucky lady be me? He has told me that he
does not see himself getting married any day soon. Should I stay and hope he
will change his mind or should I let go?
Your boyfriend seems to be giving you a clear message that you do not
want to accept. He says that he does not see himself getting married any day
soon and yet you seem to difficulty accepting what he says. You can choose
to spend more time hanging around hoping that he will change his mind.
However, you will have no one else to blame if your gamble does not work out
the way you hope.
Contrary to conventional mythology, there is more than one person in the
world who is right for each of us. I know that flies in the face of the
romantic notion that we are each destined for a particular person. If you
want to find someone who is right for you, you may be better off seeking
someone who is also looking for marriage. You have already invested three
years in this relationship; it might be time to move on. Your someone right
may be just around the corner. If your boyfriend changes his mind somewhere
down the road, and you are still available, you can always re-evaluate your
Dr. Edward A. Dreyfus is a Clinical Psychologist,
Marriage, Family, Child Therapist, and Sex Therapist. Dr. Dreyfus has been providing
psychological services in the Los Angeles-Santa Monica area for over 30 years.
He offers individual psychotherapy to adolescents and adults, divorce mediation,
couples counseling, group therapy, and career and vocational counseling and
assessment.His book, Someone Right For You, is available in the Amazing
Dr. Dreyfus can be reached at: (310) 208-5700.